Frustration decreasing.... or not

So I had my beast of a Sociology exam today, and I wasn't very pleased about that. I hope I did ok, but I have a sinking feeling that it didn't come out all that well. I don't know what the problem is with me, I just can't get into this class. I mean I've been going full tilt at school work ever since I enrolled. I felt like if I didn't get an A every time then I was throwing my money away, or wasting my potential, or worst of all, it meant that I was dumber that some of the pricks around here. It's hard to keep up that level of enthusiasm for long though, and I'm just afraid that when the grades come around this time, I'm going to be screwed. Because now, anything less than an A is going to be some kind of glaring error to anyone looking at my transcript. Like wtf is wrong with this kid, he's aced everything else, but he isn't any good at sociology? He must have fucked up people skills or something, lets not hire him because he can't deal with people. Plus now that I've let one class slip, the whole dam is going to break and I'm just going to no give a shit about grades any more. I guess it's to be expected that I can't always be at the top, especially since my classes are only going to get harder. But I'm really feeling a lack of motivation, and that IS a problem. I've still got a long ass way to go before I'm done with this semester, and I have a huge mother fucking project for the same class that is due a week from today. I've done plenty of research for it, but I haven't actually started writing this shit down..... uhg

:(

Where do these people come from?

So I've had several eventful days recently. They've kept me from updating like I want to. Right now it's break time from sociology. I've got tons of references, but I'm going through and breaking them out into categories. I realized that there was no way for me to even start this until I had it in some kind of order. God, and I have an exam in that class this coming thursday. I'm not ready at all :(

But that aside, I must write about these awesome specimens of humanity that I've had the misfortune of encountering this weekend.

Specimen 1: The Metal Hag.
On 03/25/05 Perpetual Winter played in Dee Dee's Bar located in Quincy Mass. The shitty part about the show was that Sandy couldn't be in the bar because it was a 21+ show (total bullshit btw). So a good deal of that night was actually spent sitting the rental car. Anyways, once we took the "stage" and started to rock, out of nowhere came this hideous wretch of a woman that had to be at least 50. She was wearing some manner of honey mustard yellow blouse under a black leather vest. And she was rocking out. Hard. And she apparently had also been drinking like a fish all night too, because she was fucking drunk. So we do our thing, and then vacate the bar to pack our shit up and go home. As I'm trying to get Brandon's drum into the SUV, she comes stumbling out of the darkness to tell me how awesome we were. I guess that's cool, but coming from someone's wino coke fiend grandma, it loses some of the magic of adoration.

Specimen 2: Drug Boy.
Yesterday, on Easter (a fine pagan holiday stolen by the christians), I went for a walk around Keene with Sandy. We actually covered quite a distance, and my feet were killing me by the time we made it back. We stopped at the convenience store to get a pack of cloves. This apparently was a mistake. After buying said pack of cloves, I decided to smoke one. And as I walked back to Sandy's dorm we cross the path of drug boy. Almost as soon as he saw me, he asked to bum a cigarette off me. Upon giving him one, he immediately asks me if I smoke weed, and then proceeds to show me his vaporizer (which he's just carrying around in his hand). I got to then hear all about how he grows the follow at his apartment: tobacco, marijuana, psychedelic mushrooms, and apparently his imagination. It was immediately obvious that this kid was full of more shit than the toilets on the first floor of the student center. He basically contradicted himself with every other sentence he spoke, first he wanted to know if I had weed because he was looking for some.... but then he wanted to sell me weed too, and shrooms and cocaine... After a painful 2 mins of interaction with this kid I finally am able to send him off on tangent and leave. Every second I had to talk to him I felt like my body was being irradiated by stupidity ions shooting out of his head.

God damn....

God damn sickness

This sucks, I've still got a sore throat and it's been close to 2 full weeks now. I've got to see the nurse this afternoon at 3:30, but who knows if they'll even do anything useful or if they just waist my time. I feel like shit, and it's making me act kind of bitchy. The only silver lining of my cloud of doom is that I didn't have to go to my sociology class today. But I'm still dreading this project that's coming up. I don't know how well it's going to come out, which isn't a good thing since it's worth like 25% of my grade. fuck fuck fuck. I want to go home and sleeeeeeeeeeeep.

at least things are off to a good start...

Vacation is over, and I'm mostly better, although my sinuses don't feel quite right and my throat has been sore still. But I'm on the mend. I went to class today and got my psychology exam and essay back and did really well on both. That was a plus, I was kind of dreading it, but it was much better than I expected. I have a show to play at this friday and I'm not particularly looking forward to it. I've got a ton of shit to do for this sociology class that requires a bunch of research and not a lot of time to do it. Should I have been working on it over the break? Probably. Did I? Nope. Oh well, I think there is still enough time to pull this thing out of my ass, or where ever it is that I'm going to find it. I need to figure out what the hell I should take for classes this fall, I need to register on wednesday night... uhg.

I guess today was ok

I don't have too much to complain about today, isn't that unusual. I still don't feel great, but it's manageable now for the most part. except when I wake up and late at night, then I still feel run down. We had a fairly productive band practice this evening and we got to work on another song. It's better than beating out the same old thing. I'll need to sleep pretty quick since my nyquil is catching up with me.. ZZzz...

~C~

Bored sick

or sick and bored depending on how you look at it. What have I been up to on my wonderful vacation? Doing school work. Fucking awesome, I get a break from school just to do more. I'm reading this wicked depressing book about hungry and poverty for my sociology class. It's one of those books that make you feel like you're a total ass because you don't go out to the food kitchens and volunteer 20 hours a day. It's totally biased, but yeah, hungry and poverty are bad. I need a break from this shit for real. I've cruised all over the damn internet trying to find something remotely amusing. That was cool for about 4 hours, but I'm just sick of everything right now. I'm gonna get out for a little while before I go totally nuts.

Damn these dreams

So I've already bitched about being sick so I wont get into that again (or did I just get into it?). But I've been having some really really fucked up dreams the past couple of nights. For instance: me and my dad are hanging off the sides of a orange van that is speeding down a hill with no driver, I climb on the roof and push the drivers window down (with ease.. naturally). So my dad gets inside through the window and takes control of the van. But instead of stopping it (which he did do at stop signs) he keeps us barreling down the road. Suddenly there is no more road and we're flying through a cemetery towards some huge tombstones. I jump off the van because I know there is no way we can avoid them, and my dad smashes into one. After rolling on the ground for like a mile I get up unhurt and run back to find the van to be the size of a toy siting on top of one of the stones, but my dad is still inside. SO i pick it up (the entire van) and I know that my dad is dead, but I try talking to him anyways. Then a tear comes out of his eye and he says "I love you bud, you make me and your granddad proud."

I woke up in a cold sweat, and god fucking damnit, that was fucked up and freaky. I couldn't sleep for hours after that. When I did I was being chased by cartoon ninjas throwing hundreds of shurikens at me while I was running away through some department store. How the hell does my brain come up with this stuff? I need a lobotomy

Down with the sickness (ooo ah ah ah ah!)

This is not how I wanted to start off my spring break. I'm sick with some damn thing and I feel like pummeled poop. My sinuses are killing me, which means I probably have another infection. Plus my throat is so sore I can barely stand swallowing. Im loaded up on painkillers, decongestants, vitamines, and herbs.... can't say they've done shit for me. And to top is all off, we just got another foot of snow dumped on us. Spring break my ass

Everyone is entitled to their oppinions

...But ti doesn't make them any good. seriously, some people really piss me off. This seems to happen the most often when I'm in my sociology class. Not for the obvious reasons like the fat fucking obnoxious blind kid that is always running his mouth in there. It's the bullshit that the MTV generation spews out of their mouths, these conceited little pricks always get under my skin. Maybe it's the fact that they actually believe the media, they put their trust in the insidious machine that is destroying the world around them, even as they are too oblivious to see it. It takes all I have to not fly of the handle and berate their overwhelming ignorance. It makes me sick to be grouped in with them, as an american. Like I hold some principals in common with these base, filthy, sub humans. The spirit of America died before they were even born, and we're left to rot as this cancer of a country decays the world.

We rocked all night

Last night was our show at the common ground in Brattleboro VT. The show almost didn't happen at all because when I go there we found out that Tim, who owns the place, was making up bullshit reasons why we couldn't play there. Nick had to pretty much track him down in Brat and try to convince him to let us play. Now our band only had to drive like 30 mins to get there, there was 5 other bands too and these guys came from like 3 hours away. Imagine how pissed they must have been when they heard that!

Any ways with luck some girls from the Turn It Up store that knew Tim convinced him to let the show go on. All that dicking around though took like a good 2 hours. We were headlining the show, so we didn't even go on till like 2 am or something. The other bands all kicked ass too, it turned out to be a pretty good show. Hopefully Tim saw that everyone was responsible, nothing got fucked up, and he'll let us do another show some time.... with out all the bullshit.

Breathing life into a dead husk of a blog

To say I've been a little dormant here is an understatement. I pretty much wrote this whole site off once before, just because it wasn't as convenient to use as LJ. Well I've got a cool program to handle that now, so I figure now is as good a time as any to do some updates.

I got my first exam back from my sociology class today. I was nervous before she started passing them back because she said that the class average was about a 73% But as it turns out I ended up with a 92% so that made my day.

I'm always tired these days, it's like I can't get rested anymore. Granted I haven't been sleeping very well lately, staying up past my bed time, heh. Only a week to go before I spring break starts. Sandy is going home :'( but I'm sure it'll pass quickly like it always does.